Milton

"That be from thee far; that far be from thee, father!" I remember hooting, quite incapable of keeping a straight face as I strove to give credence to the fact I found the greatest epic poem in the English language at times ... well ... uninspired.

My tutor, legs still crossed, leaned forward; as she did so, the soles of both feet touched the floor -- an uncanny trait to which several colleagues had earlier drawn my attention.

"Oh, please!" she said with conscious dignity.